SLAY THE NAYSAYERS
Jul 1, 2004 12:00 PM, The Remix Editors, Robert Hanson Erin Hutton Kylee Swenson
A few years ago, Del the Funky Homosapien recommended that I, Kylee, read The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho. No, I don't hang out at packed house parties or Sunday barbecues with Del — I'm not that cool. But in an interview, he mentioned this book. And it's been in the back of my mind ever since, until I saw that my roommate left a copy in the living room.
It took only the car ride home from the Coachella festival in Indio, Calif., to San Francisco plus another night to finish, as it was quite an easy read. But the meaning of The Alchemist is immense. The basic premise is like a parable: A Spanish shepherd boy discovers that some hidden treasure awaits him in Egypt. Along the way, he meets a mysterious king who tells him about everyone's will to meet his or her own “Personal Legend.” The boy is determined to meet his goal, and he endures being robbed and beaten to make it there. That's all I'll say before I give up the whole story, but if you're looking for something to help you shut out the naysayers whom you've met along your path, I highly recommend this.
Nevertheless, people will disagree with me about my recommendation: On Amazon.com, I read more than one scathing book review that said Coelho is a simpleton and his writing is cliché. I say that those people missed his point entirely. I believe that the people who hate the book are probably just pissed off at themselves for not getting all they can out of life, and the book made their disappointing reality more clear to them. But that's just my opinion.
The saying is crass, but the fact is, opinions are like assholes — everyone's got one. And one person's opinion shouldn't stop you from doing what you like to do. I've heard (or read) people call me stupid, a liar and (add insult here). A couple of people have said that my music is lame. Fine, they can't come to my next birthday party. I've learned that it's really, really easy to dwell on the negative things people say rather than the glowing, positive things. I'm probably one of the most sensitive types when it comes to negativity. But, as my mom once said, “If famous or successful people were turned into dust every time they heard a disparaging comment, there would be no famous or successful people on the planet.”
So get over it. If you hear something constructive in someone's comment, file that in your brain somewhere. But if it's just abrasive trash, throw it out. Maybe someone's jealous or angry at life, or maybe it's just a taste issue, and they don't like your music because it's not their cup of tea. So what? That person isn't your audience.
I might sound like a high school cheerleader or a camp counselor here, but I'm just speaking my mind. Artists such as Sasha, The X-ecutioners, Kaskade and Danger Mouse, who all speak their minds in this issue, probably wouldn't be around if they were crippled by every negative comment that they heard along the paths of their careers. Personally, another mean-spirited word or two would probably just make me more numb to the B.S. If you're going to put yourself out there, you need to develop a thick skin.
The only way to rid yourself of the naysayers is to focus on the good, constructive things people say. Print out those comments, and put them up on a bulletin board to remind yourself. And as for those unhappy harassers: Just smile, thank them for their feedback and quickly shrug off every last word.
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